Thursday, December 08, 2011

Dear Old Uncle Tony

From my mailbox. Here's a joke to share....

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Arriving in a hotel in KL Sentral he went to the bar and asked for a pint of draught Guinness. The barman nodded and said, "That will be one Ringgit please, Uncle Tony."

Somewhat taken aback, Uncle Tony replied, "That's very cheap," and handed over his money.

"Well, we try to stay ahead of the competition", said the barman. "And we are serving free pints every Wednesday evening from 6 until 8. We have the cheapest draught in Asia"

"That is remarkable value" Uncle Tony comments

"I see you don't seem to have a glass, so you'll probably need one of ours. That will be 3 Ringgit please."

Uncle Tony scowled, but paid up. He took his drink and walked towards a seat.

"Ah, you want to sit down?" said the barman. "That'll be an extra 2 Ringgit. You could have pre-book the seat, and it would have only cost you a Ringgit"

"I think you may to be too big for the seat sir, can I ask you to sit in this frame please"

Uncle Tony attempts to sit down but the frame is too small and when he can't squeeze in he complains "Nobody would fit in that little frame".

"I'm afraid if you can't fit in the frame you'll have to pay an extra surcharge of RM 4 for your seat sir"

Tony swore to himself, but paid up. "I see that you have brought your laptop with you" added the barman. "And since that wasn't pre-booked either, that will be another 3 Ringgit"

Uncle Tony was so annoyed that he walked back to the bar, slammed his drink on the counter, and yelled, "This is ridiculous, I want to speak to the manager".

"Ah, I see you want to use the counter," says the barman, "that will be 2 Ringgit please."

Uncle's face was red with rage.

"Do you know who I am?"

"Of course I do Uncle Tony"

"I've had enough, What sort of Hotel is this? I come in for a quiet drink and you treat me like this. I insist on speaking to a manager!"

"I will never use this bar again"

"OK Uncle , but remember, we are the only bar in Asia selling pints for one Ringgit... so that Now everyone can drink"

19 comments:

lmenwe said...

Yeah!This should be posted to Uncle Tony's facebook or twitter.

payee said...

Should share with alll!

sourplum said...

cool

CK said...

After all the TF bashings, one must give credit where it's due.

Within 10yrs, TF has grown AA from a nobody to one of the most recognizable name in the world. In doing so, he painted a rare but inspiration page within the corporate world of M'sia for the world to see.

Many would claim that they could do the same iff they have the same backers, as TF has.

R U SURE?

1st, based on what that u could sell the AA idea to that backers? Those backers r not idiots, who don't care about throwing money around.

2nd, even when u manage to get the backing, what make u think that u could be so creative as TF, to come up with a 'now everybody can fly' operation?

Never mind about those incidental & hidden charges behind that marketing gimmick. After all this is a business, if u r NOT good, u r OUT in the cold, period. Playing with the gullible mindset of the consumers is part of the successful business plan - aka apple.

Some do throw around some money hoping that they could get miracle out from the selected few. The corporate history of M'sian business shows - red inks all over even when operating under a monopolistic setup. Given AP & yet only know how to sell for quick money gain. Given project, that project ended up ali-baba style, etc etc ad infinitum.

AA is a non-sustainable story, as competition flares up & users mature. Look at RyanAir, VirginAir etc that operate in a matured market, their books r not pretty. One can only make money during the early year as long as the built -up debts can be deferred as long as possible.

The most recognisable part about TF's cunningness is his plan of taking leave when he reaches his target. That's where the early retirement comes in.

Eat yr heart out! I've make my cut for the rest of my life. Sayonara, backers. Thanks, no thanks.

Mr ICICI said...

This is EXACTLY what airasia is doing to their customers.

Moolah said...

ck: I've raised thee issues in the posting And What About AirAsia's Earnings?

Quote "AirAsia is committed to purchase aircrafts worth some 57.4 billion!

And what does AirAsia currently have in its balance sheet? 1.6 billion cash and loans of 7.6 billion. "

** the capital commitment to buy the new aircrafts should reach some 75 BILLION.

And yeah... with the retirement plans mentioned... and assuming the bulk of the capital commitment would be done via financing... I wonder who would ultimately end up holding this big pile of debt?

CK said...

Moo,

I 100% agreed with u about the AA's book of debt.

That's where the smart part comes in - creating a farce, fame & fortune come straight up front. Meanwhile, the debt & commitment built up into a not too distant future.

Take yr cut, midway, while the backers do a Ramli's act of MAS ( funny, why always MAS?) to get the govt involvement.

Sound familiar?

The credit for TF is for his ability to play to the tune & comes out unscratched.

Not many in the M'sia corporate world can do that. Though not in jail, but certainly which tainted label, here & afterlife!

The sukers r u & me, the gullible & yet cant-do-anything-taxpayers. Bcoz the heartlanders have long sold their souls to the principle behind that why-always-MAS-story.

Mesti jaga beriuk nasi orang kita!

Even though the 'heads' r scrapping the cash register empty. Perhaps, it's bcoz the money in the register comes from taxpayers, & 99.99% of the heartlanders don't pay tax! So it's not their money.

Comprendi?

CK said...

Moo,

Just a thought.

Can AirBus be so gullible that they just simply accept AA's order, without due financial investigation?

Sound very much like - today I open a business. Create some fanfare news headlines, plus some upfront profit. Then I go to a supplier & order goods in the billion & the supplier happily accept my business, simply bcoz I'm the business headline boy of the day.

Who should shot who? Me or the supplier?

Unless there's a catch that outsider tak tau.

My sugar daddy agrees to be my 'hidden' guarantor. So when the supplier looks behind me & see the sugar daddy plus a B&W, his doubt evaporated.

Same thing with the bankers. It's not me &/or the business, that I've a free hand with the suppliers/bankers. It's my backer, stupid!

Now, the fun part, is how I get out unscratched.

The backers always get their way in bolihland, comes what may.

See?

Moolah said...

Last time when I constantly wrote about AA (before they did their deferred their aircraft deliveries) I was worried. The size of the possible debt from their 28 Billion order was crazy in my opinion. This caused their debt to spiral no stop to over 7 billion plus. My concern? What if AA needed financial assistance? Who would ultimately pay for the bills?

( Mind you AA was getting that massive tax benefit too! )

With this current new order? The aircraft order should see AA capital commitment shoot pass 75 Billion.

75 Billion... is certainly no small change!!!!!!!!!

(ps: Irony.. when we talk ringgit and sense... how much is KLIA2 new cost? )

William Wang said...

Nice one ... should just stand and drink until he drops but Rm30 for sleeping on the floor, cheaper than hotel.

Moolah said...

ck: regarding Airbus.

AA's new order, according to AA delivery schedule, would see AA taking deliveries of new aircrafts up to 2026.


(refer http://whereiszemoola.blogspot.com/2011/06/how-is-airasia-going-to-finance-this.html )

Come 2026..... or even a nearer 2020.... we probably see a new CEO at Airbus.

So .......

CK said...

Moo,

'Come 2026..... or even a nearer 2020.... we probably see a new CEO at Airbus.'

Possibly a new major shareholder,too!

Now u r talking. ;-p

As of now, Tune Air and Khazanah collectively own 23% of AirAsia.

See the brilliant part?

CK said...

Sorry, Moo

Should be

Come 2026..... or even a nearer 2020.... we probably see a new CEO at AirAsia.

Thousand apology.

Moolah said...

ck: I just wish more could understand what could happen in the future.

See the math is simple..

Company has 1.6 billion cash and current loans is at 7.6 billion.

And the company now has an order to buy new aircrafts worth 75 billion in 15 years time????

Can someone work this math out?

Moolah said...

.... :P

I could belanja you one of them ONE ringgit Guinness.... XD

CK said...

Moo,

U worry too far ahead!

15yr & RM75B later?

Nobody knows whether that order can be fulfilled? Is there a penalty for not taking delivery of the aircraft when due? What can AirBus does IF AirAsia was history 15 yrs later?

We should stick to the current book of debt of RM5B. But then can the RM1.6B cash last while the RM7.6B reduces?

But then that's only my uneducated guesstimate. My crystal ball can't see further than tomorrow, so who am I to tell..

yuxuan said...

Was a Tunes Hotel!!!!

Moolah said...

Good article: Read the RPT between AirAsia and AirAsiaX:

http://cgmalaysia.blogspot.com/2011/12/tony-fernandes-and-airasia-too-much.html

Moolah said...

.... u know why?

They are just way too lovable!

ho ho ho!

:P